verizon’s event horizon breaks kumquats and hearts in lotusland

Another beautiful week (and weekend) in Santa Barbara! Nazy’s sister (Shahrzad) and niece (Layla) are visiting on Layla’s birthday. We began the weekend with a visit to Lotusland, one of the best botanical gardens in the world. Melika, Tom, Tiger and Arrow joined us.
Lotusland 120 year old cyprus


The 37 acre Lotusland grounds feature several gardens (e.g. aloe, cactus, Japanese, fern, water). This year has featured a wet rainy season. One of the oldest trees in the garden, a 120 year old cypress, had succumbed to the wet weather: It is to be taken down. It is the huge tree in the photo and is being replaced by a direct descendant.

We saw Spanish Moss (which is neither Spanish nor Moss) and pony tail palms (which don’t have pony tails and aren’t palms). Tiger was particularly enthralled by the lodestone, a naturally occurring magnetic rock and, of course, the fountains.

Tiger and Arrow like fountains.
Tiger and fountain lotusland March 2017

We also had a little trouble getting Tiger to wear his glasses. I think that something…

“… happened,” I told Melika. Then I tried to get information from Tiger. He was mum. I tried an alternative approach.

“Once when I was wearing my glasses, a bee got stuck between my glasses and my eyes and I didn’t want to wear them.” I asserted. “Did that ever happen to you?”

“I don’t like them Dan,” He responded. “They fall off.”

That explains it.” I thought. Skeptically!
While we were at Lotusland, Melika decided to show Tiger (and Arrow) her cartwheeling ability. (Check out the video
here.)


Melika Cartwheeling

Melika cartwheel


Layla, Dan, Arrow, Nazy, Shahrzad, Tiger, Melika and Tom


Lotusland group 2017 March


Tiger also likes taking his tricycle to the Mission Rose garden where we can pick kumquats at this time of year. The season is ending and the few remaining kumquats are almost out of reach. So, I was on my tiptoes when..

“Those are great!” A passerby called. “But too sour for him,” he continued, pointing to Tiger.

“I like them!” Tiger interjected. “Dan is getting them for me.”

“He has a very sophisticated palate,” the gentleman responded.

Maybe he just likes sour things,” I thought. “Yep!” I said.

Dan and Arrow at Lotusland

dan and arrow March 2017 lotusland

Shahrzad baked a special cake to help us celebrate Layla’s (and Nazy’s) birthdays. (Layla’s birthday is March 25th, Nazy’s is April 1st.) It is, in fact, the season of birthdays: Darius’ is on March 26. Tiger helped with the decorating.

The result?

A giant bunny!

Tiger was in charge of the
polka dots (jelly beans) on the bow tie.

minnie cake March 2017

Last week, just before she left for a wedding, Melika dropped her phone. Naturally, it broke. She ordered a replacement from Verizon and they promised to ship it (express, overnight, drone-delivered) with the exact same priority given to shipments of human organs (e.g. hearts for transplant). The new phone was guaranteed to arrive by 3:00PM the day before she was scheduled to depart.

“It’s a good thing that you didn’t drop and break your
heart,” I told Melika when she explained that the deadline had been missed and FedEx had called to (re)guarantee arrival by ‘tomorrow’.

“Won’t you be in Sun Valley ‘tomorrow’ when your new phone may arrive?”

“Yes, Dad. So I asked them if I could just go to the local store to pick up a phone there.”

“That seems reasonable.”

“Except that Verizon said that they can’t cancel an already ordered phone.”

“Ordered — but not shipped…”

“Then they said I could get the new phone from the store. They said that I could return the other phone, the one they forgot to give to Fed Ex, for full credit.”

“So you pay twice, but get a refund for one of them?”

“Well, that’s what they said — until they realized that I’d be getting back one day too late for the refund.”

“You’re only going to be gone for four days.”

“I know. That’s when they suggested that I upgrade my iPad line with a new iPhone and then when I return..”

“You jump through two hoops while performing a flute concerto as you keep a hula hoop rotating.”

“Well, sort of. I guess we’ll just use Tom’s phone. I hate Verizon.”

“I think Verizon dropped your phone into the event horizon of a black hole.. But, It could have been worse, Mel.” I commiserated.
Melika and Tiger March 2017 Right

“How?”
“You could have chosen
AT&T.”

Regular readers know that I normally make a snide remark or two about the current ‘
administration’. I’m not going to do that this time since it is too easy.






For last week's letter, click aylight saving grace at New Year derrières with blue M&M">here

Nazy and Tiger in the maze



nazy and tiger in the maze March 2017

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