I am asking you to have a baby, Melika. It’s been 9 Months
Ominous harbingers of slowly unfolding disaster filled the air as the week began with absolutely no movement on the baby front. Not convinced that Melika understood the gravity of the situation, I decided that a father-daughter conversation was in order.
“How are you feeling, Melika?” I asked.
“I feel fine, Dad.”
“Are you still pregnant?” I asked, subtly reminding her that there had been no action. I waited, expectantly, for her reply.
“Can you think of another reason that I might have gained 40 pounds in 9 months, Dad?”
“Ah ha!” I exclaimed. “Nine months! Do you know what normally happens after 9 months of pregnancy?”
“Dad —”
“If you don’t deliver a baby, I won’t have material for The Weekly Letter. I’ll have to do a series of flashbacks or write cute Tiger anecdotes. I may even have to go for a bigger font or unrelated photos. I’m counting on you, Melika.”
“Dad!”
“I’m ready, Mel,” I said, concluding my delivery.
While Melika dawdled, Tiger continued to amuse with cute anecdotes. In the past couple of weeks, he’s moved from simply speaking to having conversations. In short, he responds appropriately to what he has heard. He also recycles things that he has heard. We were playing hide and seek — well, Tiger was playing hide and seek, I was reading. He wanted me to hide, but I wasn’t moving. He looked at me and:
“I am asking you to hide, Dan!” He said.
When I told this story to my sister, she asked why Tiger is calling me ‘Dan’.
“He calls me ‘Dan’ because he thinks I’m two years old.” I told Nazy.
“Really?” Nazy asked. “Of course!” Nazy thought.
“Maybe I spent too much time at Fortune 100 management meetings.” I replied.
“That’s possible,” Nazy said. “And maybe you just never grew up.”
“Did so!” I shouted as I stamped my feet.
“You are his friend, Dan, because you listen to him,” Nazy concluded. “Now listen to me,” Nazy thought.
On Friday, Melika stopped by her doctor for her weekly ‘progress’ report. Shortly thereafter, she called from the hospital.
“We’re staying here, Mom,” Mel explained.
“Great!” Nazy replied “Finally,” Nazy thought.
“She’s there because the doctor discovered that her water broke,” Nazy explained later.
“She didn’t know her water broke?” I asked.
“No.”
“How is that possible?” I asked. “When someone said: ‘My water broke’, I’ve always imaged a water balloon and a balcony,” I thought.
“It’s like a tire, Dan,” Nazy explained. “There are blowouts ..”
“Yep!” I interjected triumphantly.
“ … and slow leaks.”
“Slow is certainly the operative word here,” I thought.
In any case, however, there was now no doubt that the baby was on the way. We picked up Tiger, some chocolates, Melika’s favorite pillow and a couple of soft blankets before driving to the hospital. Mel was doing fine. Tiger was plussed as he waited, with Tom and Melika, for the new baby.
“Plussed, Dan?” Nazy asked. “Do you mean nonplussed?”
“No. And since he wasn’t nonplussed, he must have been plussed.”
After visiting Melika and Tom at the hospital, we joined Mitra (who had serendipitously driven up for the weekend) for dinner. We were assured that things were moving — slowly.
At around 7:00, I sent a text message to Tom:
“We are thinking of taking in a movie, Do you think we have time?”
“Absolutely!” Tom replied erroneously — and not getting the joke.
“He says things are moving slowly,” I explained to Nazy and Mitra. “But the epidural is being administered now. Tom thinks the baby will arrive a little after mid-night.”
We drove directly to the hospital.
Aside: While we en route: Melika, for some reason uncomfortable, sat down on a chair next to the bed. Tom, tired, had taken her place on the bed. When the anesthesiologist arrived, it looked like Tom was ready for the epidural. This may explain why his legs were rubbery during delivery.
We got to the hospital around 7:45 when Tom sent a text saying that things had sped up — but there were protocols about how soon we could see the new arrival: “It will be at least two hours after the birth”, Tom said in a text message.
The baby arrived less than an hour later and about 30 minutes after that, we also saw Mom, Tom and baby.
In spite of all my jokes about delayed birth, the newest baby arrived only one day after the initial due date. Moreover, Tom and Melika were well-prepared. Their home is ready, Tiger has been educated, the cat is phlegmatic and the name was chosen, but:
I can’t say whether you’ve had a boy or girl?” I replied - well aware that previous paragraphs had been recomposed.
“Can you just help with a name?” Melika asked.
“I’m partial to both Danielle and Daniel,” I replied. “Can you tell me which would be most appropriate?”
“Not until our announcement,” Tom requested.
“How are you feeling, Melika?” I asked.
“I feel fine, Dad.”
“Are you still pregnant?” I asked, subtly reminding her that there had been no action. I waited, expectantly, for her reply.
“Can you think of another reason that I might have gained 40 pounds in 9 months, Dad?”
“Ah ha!” I exclaimed. “Nine months! Do you know what normally happens after 9 months of pregnancy?”
“Dad —”
“If you don’t deliver a baby, I won’t have material for The Weekly Letter. I’ll have to do a series of flashbacks or write cute Tiger anecdotes. I may even have to go for a bigger font or unrelated photos. I’m counting on you, Melika.”
“Dad!”
“I’m ready, Mel,” I said, concluding my delivery.
While Melika dawdled, Tiger continued to amuse with cute anecdotes. In the past couple of weeks, he’s moved from simply speaking to having conversations. In short, he responds appropriately to what he has heard. He also recycles things that he has heard. We were playing hide and seek — well, Tiger was playing hide and seek, I was reading. He wanted me to hide, but I wasn’t moving. He looked at me and:
“I am asking you to hide, Dan!” He said.
When I told this story to my sister, she asked why Tiger is calling me ‘Dan’.
“He calls me ‘Dan’ because he thinks I’m two years old.” I told Nazy.
“Really?” Nazy asked. “Of course!” Nazy thought.
“Maybe I spent too much time at Fortune 100 management meetings.” I replied.
“That’s possible,” Nazy said. “And maybe you just never grew up.”
“Did so!” I shouted as I stamped my feet.
“You are his friend, Dan, because you listen to him,” Nazy concluded. “Now listen to me,” Nazy thought.
On Friday, Melika stopped by her doctor for her weekly ‘progress’ report. Shortly thereafter, she called from the hospital.
“We’re staying here, Mom,” Mel explained.
“Great!” Nazy replied “Finally,” Nazy thought.
“She’s there because the doctor discovered that her water broke,” Nazy explained later.
“She didn’t know her water broke?” I asked.
“No.”
“How is that possible?” I asked. “When someone said: ‘My water broke’, I’ve always imaged a water balloon and a balcony,” I thought.
“It’s like a tire, Dan,” Nazy explained. “There are blowouts ..”
“Yep!” I interjected triumphantly.
“ … and slow leaks.”
“Slow is certainly the operative word here,” I thought.
In any case, however, there was now no doubt that the baby was on the way. We picked up Tiger, some chocolates, Melika’s favorite pillow and a couple of soft blankets before driving to the hospital. Mel was doing fine. Tiger was plussed as he waited, with Tom and Melika, for the new baby.
“Plussed, Dan?” Nazy asked. “Do you mean nonplussed?”
“No. And since he wasn’t nonplussed, he must have been plussed.”
After visiting Melika and Tom at the hospital, we joined Mitra (who had serendipitously driven up for the weekend) for dinner. We were assured that things were moving — slowly.
At around 7:00, I sent a text message to Tom:
“We are thinking of taking in a movie, Do you think we have time?”
“Absolutely!” Tom replied erroneously — and not getting the joke.
“He says things are moving slowly,” I explained to Nazy and Mitra. “But the epidural is being administered now. Tom thinks the baby will arrive a little after mid-night.”
We drove directly to the hospital.
Aside: While we en route: Melika, for some reason uncomfortable, sat down on a chair next to the bed. Tom, tired, had taken her place on the bed. When the anesthesiologist arrived, it looked like Tom was ready for the epidural. This may explain why his legs were rubbery during delivery.
We got to the hospital around 7:45 when Tom sent a text saying that things had sped up — but there were protocols about how soon we could see the new arrival: “It will be at least two hours after the birth”, Tom said in a text message.
The baby arrived less than an hour later and about 30 minutes after that, we also saw Mom, Tom and baby.
In spite of all my jokes about delayed birth, the newest baby arrived only one day after the initial due date. Moreover, Tom and Melika were well-prepared. Their home is ready, Tiger has been educated, the cat is phlegmatic and the name was chosen, but:
I can’t say whether you’ve had a boy or girl?” I replied - well aware that previous paragraphs had been recomposed.
“Can you just help with a name?” Melika asked.
“I’m partial to both Danielle and Daniel,” I replied. “Can you tell me which would be most appropriate?”
“Not until our announcement,” Tom requested.
Mitra and Nazy prepared a beautiful gift to celebrate the birth. Mitra wrote a poem and Nazy painted the illustrations. The work was personalized for Tiger and his newly enlarged family. This issue of The Weekly Letter includes a single page extract, but next week’s edition will provide a link to the entire book.
For last week's letter, click here
Several photos follow:
The first page of the book
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